Joke Of The Day

It's Harvest Sunday at a small village church in rural England and the preacher is organizing his annual harvest service where people bring their home-grown plants and vegetables to the service.

But this year is different. The local village cricket team has just won their league and the village is in a celebratory mood so the preacher decides to do something special - he will combine the normal harvest service with a cricket theme.

The day of the service arrives and the church is filled with flowers.

People are bringing in their offerings of vegetables, and in the middle of the display is a cricket wicket, a strip of turf with a set of wooden stumps at each end, and people are laying their offerings on the wicket.

Everything is going fine until one lady comes up to the front of the church and places a bag of frozen peas among the other vegetables.

She is stopped by the preacher and returns to her seat still clutching her peas.

"What happened?" asked the lady she's sitting next to.

She shrugs her shoulders and says, "There's no peas for the wicket."

Bonus Joke:

It was Super Bowl Sunday and, in our Presbyterian church, the time for the collection of tithes and offerings was approaching. The minister, who was a true sports enthusiast, reached into his pocket, took out a quarter, flipped it into the air, and glanced at it as it landed.

Then in typical referee-fashion, he joyfully announced: "The ushers have elected to receive!"

Extra Bonus Joke:

A minister in Florida lamented that it was difficult to get his message across to his congregation:
"It's so beautiful here in the winter," he said, "that heaven doesn't interest them."

"And it's so hot here in the summer that hell doesn't scare them."

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